Wednesday, January 30

you know she's only waiting on the next best thing

It seems like everyone these days is trying one of those online dating sites. I’ve signed up in the past myself. I’m always amazed at how I can answer the survey questions truthfully and end up with a profile that is nothing like me. So I thought I’d make my own questionnaire. Hmmm…let’s see…

Please answer honestly. Remember: you have no idea of my preferences, so there’s no reason to try and shade your answers one way or another – just tell me.

How many times have you been called an idiot this week?
Is this an average week?
Are you an idiot?
Do you use drugs? What? How often?
Do you have now or have you ever had a sexually transmitted disease?
Did you finish high school?
How far did you get after high school (if you finished)?
Why did you keep pursuing education or why did you stop?
Which sports are you a fan of?
Which ones will you watch just because they’re on TV?
Which, if any, do you play?
How much attention do you need?
Do you remember details?
Do you remember relationship details?
Have you ever walked out of a movie?
If yes, which one?
Do you ‘get’ Monty Python?
What annoys you? (go ahead, list away)
How many friends do you have?
How many times a week do you see them?
How many times a week, month or year do you talk to your parents/siblings?
Do you read a newspaper?
If someone gave you a billion dollars what is the first thing you would buy?

OK minions, your turn. What would you ask in your dating meme?

14 Comments:

Flynn said...

Right then, I usually don't fill these out, but this one is more fun than question lists usually are.
[takes deep breath]
none
yes
no
Nope, unless you count beer. I would pass a piss-test at any rate.
Nope.
Yes.
Super Senior at Vatican U baby! [puts away toga]
I want a fud (PhD)
Football, hockey, soccer. But only the big games really.
Same list.
I played Football and a little Hockey, and I broke more bones than I care to admit. These days it's racquet sports: badminton, squash, racquetball, and handball of course.
Medium-ish I suppose.
Yes.
Always.
Yes.
Batman and Robin.
Reference by blog.
Annoys me eh? [second deep breath]
-ignorance
-proud Luddites
-people blaming things instead of parenting, video games, devil music, etc
-babies [shivers]
-clutter
-PEBCAK
-and more...
A good friend of mine once said that there are two kinds of friends. Friends that help you move, and friends that help you move bodies. I have lots of the former, and a few of the latter.
Too many to count. I live with a few of them.
Parents, few times a week. Siblings, usually Christmas.
Yes, but in digital format.
Gift cards for my friends tuition, then a house, furnishings, computers, etc. I like this game.

WNG said...

FLynn, I believe I could actually date you. You know,if we didn't live ten million miles away from each other.
At any rate, I think my questions are a lot better than the ones at those crappy dating sites! You and the Pater should make a BV dating site, THAT would be worth signing up for :)

meno said...

If the answer is NO to the Monty Python question, it would be over before it started.

NoRegrets said...

Ok, I know you don't want to date me, but I'm answering anyway.
-.001
-week's not over yet
-depends on the subject
-yes. Avapro, Lexapro, Wellbutrin, and Valtrex. Daily.
-Yes. And is that a bad thing?
-yes
-I got about 400 miles to college, and then another couple thousand to study overseas for a year, etc.
-Learning is a lifelong experience.Hopefully.
-Most sports. Even fishing.
-'just because they are on tv' um, don't know. all?
-volleyball sometimes. does biking and climbing count?
-lots and lots
-depends on how important the subject is to me
-hell yes, except if I'm wrong.
-yes
-Blue Velvet
-yes
-when people ignore emails/phone calls, snotty people, stupid people when they get in my way, nail clipping in public, squeaky bikes, and more
-depends on how deep you're talking
-do I have to 'see' them? how about just contact in any way? ie, blog, email, phone...
- several times a week
-yes
-a new, safe car for my mom

WNG said...

Meno - you're breaking my heart :(

NoR - I do want to date you, I DO!

Susan said...

First, my questions:

1. Has anyone ever referred to you as a douchebag?
2. In a drunken fit have I ever referred to you as a douchebag?
3. Do you wake up in the morning and say "damn I'm a douchebag"?
(ok, swear that theme is over)
4. Do you want to just have random sex?
5. No, seriously, 'cause that's cool and all but just go to a bar, damnit. Get off my profile, bitches.
6. Would you call your mother a "crazy bitch"?
7. Has anyone ever commented on how much like your mother you are?
8. Do you like pina coladas?
9. And gettin' caught in the rain?
(hah, again, done)
10. You're making me a soundtrack--what's the first song?
11. Are you in a relationship? (this includes not only married and dating but also those random girls you bang on a regular basis that are hopelessly in love with you that will stalk me like no one's business and make my life a living hell)
12. We're out drinking. G shows up and we get obnoxiously drunk. Do you try to talk us into a 3some?

How many times have you been called an idiot this week? Zero. How crazy is that?
Is this an average week?I'd say at least once. Even I have my moments...
Are you an idiot? See above.
Do you use drugs? What? How often? Well, if you consider alcohol a drug then probably usin' at least once a weekend.
Do you have now or have you ever had a sexually transmitted disease? Nope.
Did you finish high school? Yep. 5th in my class (everyone above me had 4.0. I had 3.97)
How far did you get after high school (if you finished)? I'm in college right now. Major: Psychology-Minor: sociology & philosophy. you will NEVER win an argument with me. lol
Why did you keep pursuing education or why did you stop? I tend to always think there's something more out there...and I'm out to find it.
Which sports are you a fan of? Football, baseball, basketball, hockey, golf, water polo..I think I like them all
Which ones will you watch just because they’re on TV? Eh, hrrmm, bowling
Which, if any, do you play? Golf
How much attention do you need? I can't pay attention to myself let alone expect someone else to..
Do you remember details? As long as there's nothing shiny to distract me.
Do you remember relationship details? Yes, to each painful little piece.
Have you ever walked out of a movie? Nope, I will watch them to the bitter end with a "this..has to get better" attitude.
If yes, which one?
Do you ‘get’ Monty Python? "I don't know" AAAAHHHH
What annoys you? (go ahead, list away) People in general. lol..uhhh....if pictures aren't straight on the wall...when people don't call..when people do call
How many friends do you have?Lots. Few very close ones though
How many times a week do you see them?At least 5 days.
How many times a week, month or year do you talk to your parents/siblings?I pretty much talk to them on a daily basis. We're all pretty close.
Do you read a newspaper? Our paper is pointless but I still read it.
If someone gave you a billion dollars what is the first thing you would buy? Is freedom for sale???


...I know you totally want me now. lol

NoRegrets said...

OK, so
12. We're out drinking. G shows up and we get obnoxiously drunk. Do you try to talk us into a 3some?
G and NoR show up together and we ALL get drunk, do you try to talk us into a 4some?
13. Will it be worth our while?

Sorry,,,had to. :-)

The CEO said...

Happily married for so long(37 years), the only issue is, are you my wife? I'm not good here, sorry, thought about it.

WNG said...

You guys crack me up. Susan, who wouldn't want us in a threesome, unless they could get us AND NoR!
Great questions, Susan, we should start our own website :)
NoR- worth our while sexually, emotionally or financially?
CEO- You are great here - that should be your only question! We're all jealous of you and your Mrs, but we'll get over it :)

guerreiranigeriana said...

lol...i love it...i vote you do start your own site...

WNG said...

Guerre- I should!!! There should be a site where you get to ask your OWN questions. Brilliant!

heartinsanfrancisco said...

All good questions, only someone who IS an idiot probably doesn't know it, if my experiences when I was dating are any indication.

NoRegrets said...

WNG - sexually of course, since if it were financially, that would make us prostitutes, and emotionally, well, we wouldn't go there.

WNG said...

Hearts - true...true... still, you have to ask.

NoR - just checking :)