Friday, December 26

'n stuff

  • For Christmas I watched all of season four of Grey's Anatomy on DVD, ate a lot of pasta, slept and ignored my phone. Good Times.
  • One day someone will get me The West Wing: The Complete Series on DVD. It will happen. G has faith.

  • Val gave me the best present EVER: Vodka! Actually, since she is a true friend she combined my favorite thing about the South (sweet tea) with Vodka and gave me Firefly Sweet Tea Vodka, which is actually distilled about 25 mins from Papa g's house 9begging the question: Why did papa G never tell me about this?!?!). Look for it in liquor stores nationwide minions and drink a toast to me:

Firefly Sweet Tea Vodka is the distillery's newest product on the market. The product is an infusion of American Tea and Firefly Vodka. Firefly Distillery is proud to bring true southern products to the marketplace. (70 proof)Firefly Muscadine Wine Flavored Vodka. The inspiration for a muscadine wine flavored vodka came from the 11.5 acres of vineyard where the distillery is located. As the muscadine grape is native to the South, Firefly is a southern distillery. The muscadine infusion creates a smooth sippin' vodka that is easily imbibed. (80 proof)

  • I changed my mind on the Tibetan Terrier and decided to go with the Norfolk Terrier. I put down a deposit and my puppy will be born in April. (Yes, a deposit. There was also an interview. No. I'm not kidding.) In the meantime, here are some pics of his cousins! What is cuter? NOTHING!

  • Someone needs to send Monty to the store for Snickerdoodle cookies before I tear my hair out from sheer shock and disbelief.
  • Maybe there should be a re-minionification program...
  • Coming soon - why are there no bakeries where you can get blondies, but all of them have brownies???
  • Oh yeah, I'll be in Chucktown for New Year's Eve... Colonel Mustard and The Condiments will be playing the Beer Works if any of you want to come hang with Mama G and I. Or you can just wait for the hangover stories when I get back... either way...

Friday, December 19


The Great Snickerdoodle Pronouncement has apparently created some dissension in the ranks. There are minions who think it is permissible to disagree with me. Of course they will be dealt with swiftly ... and never heard from again.

In the meantime here's a little something to ponder: Thursday morning I drove 188 miles to Raleigh, NC (Go Wolfpack!) for a training thingy for work. Thursday night I took in a Hurricanes game (they won. i am such good luck!) with Val and her fam in their super swanky seats (free food+free drinks= happy g). This morning I drove 216 miles to get back to work back here in VA by 9am. Here's the question, minions?


* answer: g just isn't too smart sometimes.

Tuesday, December 16

no, seriously

What is better than a Snickerdoodle?
There I was in the cookie aisle, looking for something to bring to the Cookie Swap at work tomorrow (which is a great, cheap holiday party idea for anyone still looking for one) and feeling guilty because there is no way my still-plague-riddled body is going to bake tonight when I saw before me Pepperidge Farm Snickerdoodles. There was only one bag left and I snatched it up like a New Yorker at a sample sale. I also bought two other kinds to take to the swap but the Snickerdoodles are all mine.

Yummy, soft, chewy cinnamon goodness that makes the entire world seem right eve if it isn't. Do you want to know the best dessert in the history of desserts? Take a Snickerdoodle (or two) and put it in an ice cream bowl and pop it in the microwave for a few seconds, then top it off with Caramel Dolce de Leche Haagen Daaz and prepare to forget your troubles.

I mean that is some serious yum. I know this may not seem like a deep thought I'm sharing here, minions, but on a dark cold winter night this is some serious comfort. Cinnamon is a holiday flavor for me and Snickerdoodles have always been holiday cookies to me. This year I won't be home for Christmas, but I will have snickerdoodles and ice cream and all will be right with the world.

On another serious note - I bought my Christmas present to myself today - Civilization IV, so if you don't hear from me for a while it's because I have abandoned you all to create and rule my own nation of minions. It's not that I don't love you all, it's just taht your Goddess G is a big dork.

Saturday, December 13

no more shiggity*

*If you aren't a regular Tom Joyner Morning Show listener you may not know that shiggity= shit.
**this is really long...too bad, read it anyway

I have been fighting with my mother lately. She hasn't been fighting with me I have been fighting with her, or rather with everything she has done in the past few years that hurt me that I never called her on, so of course she never stopped doing it and I never stopped getting hurt. And why was I doing this? Because after Papa G dropped the bomb (Bonnie) on me a few years ago I felt like I needed to protect my mother (from what? everything. nothing. everything no one had before. everything no one had protected me from). But I didn't protect anyone - I hurt myself and set her up to hurt me. I am so smooth. I've learned that there are all sorts of ways to lie to someone and not telling them what you need or when they hurt you can be one of the worst. Cross your fingers for us minions, ok?

So Pookie The Wonder Jetta and I are driving home tonight and I'm still fighting off the last dregs of this head cold (the damn thing has guerilla resistance fighters working for it, I swear) and all I really want is for the new Rolling Stone to be in my mailbox when I get home. It is (because i've got it like that) and I immediately wish for a million dollars to be in my mailbox. I'll keep you updated on that when I check it Monday.

Two things about RS: 1. There's an article about how Pres Shrub is fucking us over in his last days that mentions the change in environmental rules in West Va and I'm not one to brag but I totally beat RS to that story by MORE THAN A MONTH. Look it up minions, I kicked RS butt! *pause for happy dance*

There's also an article about real life super heroes. No, I'm not kidding. Men and women who dress up and patrol the streets of their cities fighting crime. In the end it comes down to how you see reality and the lengths you are willing to go to follow your dreams. At least that's what I choose to take out of it. (I just read The Watchmen and I really do not want to go into the eery similarities between the book and that article)

All of this rambling is prelude to this: I got the January O magazine today. Yes, the gift from Mama G that keeps on giving. Usually I just go straight to the recipies and the shoes, but this one had an article about how it is not a failure of will that keeps us from changing but rather an ironic act of self preservation. We protect ourselves right into danger. We have to give up some very deeply held beliefs in order to change. We have to kill off a part of ourselves. Now maybe its a bad part of you that needs to go - the self destructive impulse that keeps the pack of Marloboro Lights in my purse for example, but it's still a part of me and that part will fight to live. The article suggested a four step approach: Write down your goal, write down all the ways you usually shoot yourself in the foot when you try to reach it, then list all the reasons you shouldn't reach it. The thing is that those reasons are usually pretty logical. Then you have to trick yourself - start small: say no to one party and see that your friends really won't hate you for not showing up, delegate something small and see that the world really doesn't fall apart if you aren't running it, try to keep five pounds off for six months instead of fifty and see that you really can do it. I thought hmm...this makes sense. I've been (once again) protecting myself right into getting hurt. Well, at least I'm consistent.

I would follow all of those steps, but like I've said before, I suck at rule following. And the thing is that I think I'm doing a lot better right now than I was last year at this time. I am more honest with myself, my family and friends. I am in a better place financially. I am happier in my job. I am taking better care of Pookie The Wonder Jetta. So what I'm thinking my New Year's Resolution will be is to keep doing what I'm doing - trying to be less unhappy, trying to create joy in the world in my own little snarky way.

There are a couple of concrete things that I am working on:

I'm not volunteering for anything at all in any way for the first six months of the year. I tend to get too focused outward and let my life fall apart while I'm trying to help someone else. I am volunteering for myself for a while.

I will be completely out of debt by this time next year. C.O.M.P.L.E.T.E.L.Y.

There is no reason for me to be lonely. I know people and I know how to use a phone. I will stop being an idiot.

With my first bonus check of the new year I am signing up for at least three dating sites and I will accept at least one date a month from each of them for the first three months (unless I meet someone serious before the three months are up). I will also let my friends know that I'm up for blind dates. No more hiding in my house.

I'm getting a puppy for my birthday. I'm getting the puppy I want. I'm not listening to any puppy advice. I am getting what I want.

I am going to start spoiling myself. I am going to give myself more love, more fun, more health and more hugs. I'm going to give myself more chances at work, more time with people I love, more new things to learn, more VODKA, more challenges and more travel. I'm going to spoil myself rotten.

I'm going after my dream. ActionWorks will be a website by the end of this year. (more on that later)

Friday, December 12


In the four days that I've been back at work I cannot even begin to estimate how many phone calls I've answered from people wanting to donate things to the victims of the fire. It has been a great comfort to all of the victims and to all of us in the community to know that our neighbors are there for us.

The Fire Marshal says hewon't have any answers for at least another week or two, and that's hard, but there is an apartment filled with donated clothing and a storage unit full of furniture. A company dropped off kitchen and bath supplies today and a woman came by with bags full of toiletries. A lot of these are people who are passing it on. People who's own friends and family were affected by Katrina or the Chesapeake tornado seemed to be the first ones stepping up.

Then there's the chief. You cansay whatever youwant about our men and women in uniform, Lord knows they aren't perfect (neither is the country they serve) but at times like this you gain awhole new appreciation for them. The Chief has a whole new wardrobe and his apartment has been fully outfitted. I mean he has everything from toilet paper to furniture. Every detail of a home that you can think of has been brought by the men and women of his ship. I wish I could give the name of the ship here, but I can't. You know who you are, if you're reading this. While I know that your generosity and loyalty has touched your Cheif, let me just say that it has inspired the entire community.

They didn't stop there. Once the Chief had everything he needed they kept giving, bringing items into the office for the other families. We are at the point now where we areasking people to donate to the Red Cross Disaster Fund or the SalvationArmy in the name of the victims.

We've also filled a box for Toys For Tots with all the overflow toys donated to the children who were victims of the fire. Next month we'll have a blood drive at the apartment community to thank the Red Cross for everything they've done. This tragedy has turned into something with gilt edges. While the loss of two children and their grandmother will never be made right I hope that they can see what has happened here. I hope that they see the love that their familyand friends have been wrapped in. I hope that brings them peace.

Thank you Hampton Roads, Thank you Virginia and North Carolina. We won't forget and we will do our best to pay it forward.

hot in herrre

I'm feverish.

My headcold and the accompanying fever have put a sparkle in my eye and (more) color in my cheeks. Apparently sickness is attractive, strange, right?

I can't think about any one thing for too long, my mind flits like a butterfly in an attempt to ignore the massive headache pounding behind my eyes.

Being sick and single at the same time sucks. Where is the man who can cuddle me until I feel better?

I'm feverish - in many, many senses of the word. I need a cold shower, some hot tea and a nap.
See ya'll later, minions.

Thursday, December 11

when it rains

I am too sick for words. Apparently I'm too sick for Tylenol or DayQuil either, although both the drugs and I are struggling valiantly against the desire to curl up in a ball and cover my head for at least a week.

The fire victims are doing better, donations of food, clothes, money and furniture have come pouring out of our community and have renewed my faith in it...even through my acetaminaophin haze.
Soon there will be more about the crazy trip to the Bahamas with the Family of G, but for now here are some pictures of the awesomeness that is me, and those who get to bask in my glow.

Me, Sister of G and Nephew of G

Papa G and his Favorite Daughter on his 80th Birthday!

Papa G and all his women...well, not ALL of them... just the Sisters G!

Monday, December 8

since i been gone

On Thursday night, while i was enjoying my family in the Bahamas three members of my work-family passed away. You may remember, minions, that I recently started working at an apartment community. On Thursday night there was a fire that left about 30 people homeless and took the lives of three people. Names haven't been released to the press yet, so I won't release them here but I will tell you that two were small children.

I just retunred from my family trip about an hour ago and won't be able to see the damage for myself until I go to work tomorrow, but I'd like to ask you all to say a prayer for the victims of this fire and if you would like to send anything from money to winter clothes or toys for the families and children you can make donations to the Bimini Fire Fund, 2 Tradewinds Quay, Hampton, VA 23666.

I'll keep you updated tomorrow and I'll have pictures and happy news from the trip posted soon. For now if you could justsend some good thought, vibes, prayers or whatever you've got our way that would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks minions.

Tuesday, December 2

Home is where

I now have internet!

Yeah, I know, it took me waaaaaay longer than I said it would. Don't worry, it's here now and there are no longer any excuses for me not posting on a regular basis. Except right now I have to run out and get super glue for the Hershey bars. And tomorrow I have to drive to SC to go to the Bahamas for Papa G's 80th Bday.

At some point (maybe tonight if I can get these damned bars done!) I will explain all of this. In the meantime - I will be back home on Monday and will no longer have ANY excuse for not paying strict attention to my minions!!!

ps - crazy glue was aptly named...i'm just sayin'